Friday, September 5, 2008

3-D Horror

Remember being a little kid and getting so excited at the movie theater that you get to use a pair of 3-D glasses?

Actually, forget being a little kid...I still enjoy throwing on a pair of 3-D glasses and seeing what happens.

***Author's Note: I would actually like to apologize for the above photo of Jim. That pic is from 2005 and doesn't do him any justice, because thanks to joining Jared on the Subway diet, Jim now looks more streamlined, like this:

Actually, Jim looks like this now because of so many scary Monster Bashes scaring the weight right off of him!
So, sorry Jim. I didn't have any recent stock 3D photos of us.***

Anyway, 3D movies, when done correctly, can provide a wild and spooOooOoOoOoky viewing experience.

And in horror, this is no different.

Throw on a pair of 3D glasses and check this website out for the history of 3d horror! And then, to read about why 3d horror is awesome, go here!

So let's discuss the ups, and downs, of 3D horror.


"Friday...the 13th...Part 3-D"

Say that 5 times fast! The movie had things such as yo-yos coming at you, people reaching toward you, pitchforks coming at you, crossbows coming at name it, it pops out at you in...3d!

Also, someone actually made a video of all of the death scenes in part 3, which Monster Bash finds so incredibly awesome, I'm posting it here!

  • House of Wax (1953). Vincent Price. Enough said. The movie's plot is based around a sculptor who uses real bodies in his wax museum. The use of 3d was to compete with the threat of television, and was used mainly in the museum fire scene and a can can girl scene. The trailer calls 3d a MIRACLE:

  • It Came from Outer Space. This 1953 movie is about a meteor that crashes in Arizona and only a scientist (how convenient) and schoolteacher are the witnesses. Aliens are obviously behind the whole thing, except these aliens actually aren't even bad guys at all. For 1953, 3D was a big deal, so I admire their cutting edge film making.

But...they can't all be good....


  • Jaws 3-D. Oh Lord. Let me preface this by saying that I am a HUGE advocate for Jaws, the original. That movie made me avoid the ocean like you wouldn't believe. Even Jaws 2, I could watch. But Jaws 3-D? Forget it. Even having 3D technology and Dennis Quaid in this couldn't save it. Look at this teaser trailer:

So you can just imagine what this is about, right? The oldest Brody son is now working for SeaWorld in Orlando, preparing to open a new "Undersea Kingdom" exhibit. Of course, there's an angry shark looming around, because her baby shark was killed. Unlike the usual itsy bitsy 25 foot sharks, The shark in Jaws 3D is actually 35 feet long. The use of 3D was done for the effect of the shark coming out at the audience chomping, especially in a scene where the shark jumps through the acryllic glass at the biologists. Overall though, this movie, with or without 3D effects, pales in comparison to the original.

  • Amityville 3-D. I think that in 1983, people were just foaming at the mouth to remake every horror movie into a 3D one. And this movie is no exception.

While this movie claims to not be based around the original "true" story of the Lutz and DeFeo families that drove the first two films, there are still references to the original and the main character is living in the infamous Amityville house. At least the trailer has some awesome 3-D action in it.

  • Night of the Living Dead 3D. I had really high hopes for this one. It was a remake paying homage to George Romero's 1968 original awesome screenplay, this time with 3D. The guy from House of 1000 Corpses is in it. The trailer looks awesome. How could this be bad? Well, don't ask. Just be assured that I wouldn't steer you wrong. As the IMDB review said, "this is complete and utter garbage". They are correct. It was so bad, that I couldn't even finish watching. It's only 80 minutes too. Jim and I shut it off after about 25 minutes. Couldn't even finish it. Terrible. Don't be fooled by the trailer:

In conclusion, 3D movies are awesome...when they're done right!


Peggy, Nora, and Jules said...

Hey Kim!

Your blog is so funny. You bring back fond memories with SNICK and Goosebumps and the like. Each wing in my school is named after an author and one is called "R.L. Stine Drive." I knew you'd appreciate that...

I can't believe you missed Obama by a day! What about Biden? Either one of those sexy, sexy men I would drool over...

Jim said...

I would to to petition the manufacturers and designers at the 3-D glasses plant.

I wear 3-D glasses once every four years.

Situations that require the use of 3-D glasses seem to pop up rarely in life.

However, when those situations do present themselves, I rely on you to provide me (the consumer) with two things: 1) The miracle of being able to see things in 3-D and 2) A comfortable viewing experience.

In regard to the first point of discussion, you guys are providing a passable experience. I see in 3-D.


However, providing a comfortable viewing experience you are not.

These glasses hurt your ears, ladies and gentlemen.

I wear them for six minutes and I have blisters.

I know that 3-D glasses aren't meant to be worn long-term (past the length of say, a movie) but can we get some sort of padding
for these glasses please?

Thank you.

Monster Bash Blog said...


I want to live on r.L. Stine Drive! let's live there!

I got you some delightful Amish pretzels. I'll have to get them to you before Jim eats them all.

I can't wait to watch Palin vs. Biden in a debate. Biden would do circles around her.

Monster Bash Blog said...


I have no idea what you're talking about.