Saturday, February 13, 2010

Saw III put me at a crossroads...also, who the F is this "Shawnee" character???!

I've been having this ritual that on Friday nights, late at night, when my mind just won't slow down from the insanely horrible week I've just had...

I watch the horror movie that is featured on Syfy (formerly Sci-Fi).

It really doesn't matter what garbage they show, I'm going to watch it-start to finish.

So last night, Saw III was on.

Now, I saw....Saw (the original Saw).
And was alright. I know alot of people like this series, but for me, I just couldn't really get into it.

Don't get me wrong, I love Carey Elwes and Danny Glover. I think they're great. The foot getting sawed off was pretty gruesome too. Maybe I'm just not smart and puzzle-y enough for it? I don't know. It's not that it had problems or anything...I did find the "Jigsaw" guy to be kind of a creeper, but not in a scary way, more in like a "is he a registered sex offender?" kind of way.
Saw III Pictures, Images and Photos
"I have some candy in my car, little girl"

I just wasn't in love. It's not you, it's ME, Saw series.
It wasn't a Jason Voorhees moment for me at all.

So when Saw II came out, I was disinterested and never "Saw" it.

Then VH1 did that show "Scream Queens"...remember that? And the host was some chick I never heard of: Shawnee Smith. And they said she was from the Saw series (gotta be honest, I don't remember her in the first one at all, I had to go back and read the synopsis). I just remember being baffled that they considered here the "scream queen of horror" when I had never really heard of her. Was Jamie Lee Curtis busy when they filmed this?
P.S. here's the clip of the winner, Tanedra, in Saw VI:

Yikes. The arm?!

Anyway, I was fascinated by this Shawnee character and why she was considered the Queen of Horror. I thought that was me?
Why was she given this title? After the show would end though, I'd quickly forget all about it.

Then Saw III came on. And I remembered my quest. Who was this Shawnee character anyway? I had to know. Once and for all.

Well, and have some extensive info on this woman. Here are 5 frightening Shawnee facts:

1. She starred in The Blob, Who's Harry Crumb?, and Summer School.

2. She fronted a band called "Fydolla ho", which she founded with Robert Trujillo (Metallica) which sounds like Veruca Salt/Hole kind of?:

3. She is now in a band called "Smith & Pile" which is a country band.:

4. She has 2 kids and is rumored to have a 3rd on the way.

5. She apparently hates horror movies? I think that's a lie. Since she's starred in a whole heap of them.

Ok, so now I feel better knowing about her. But what's her deal in these movies?

So I watched Saw III, and as a general rule with any horror movie, after I've started watching the first 15 minutes, I'm invested. Good or bad, I need to watch the whole thing.

So I did.

I don't know how I feel. Maybe it was because it was so late at night and I just couldn't sleep, but I think I liked it. I definitely didn't hate it. And I couldn't stop watching.

Could I be at a Saw Crossroads?

The Pig Vat scene made me almost dry heave...and the Twisting Rack was pretty hard to watch...I think the PG version is more fun to watch.

I do think that because I skipped Saw II, I missed out on the flashbacks, because I had no idea who some of those people were. But overall, entertaining.

I don't know if I'll see Saws IV-XXXXXVVIIII, but I thought Saw III was pretty decent.

So wait, the guy had brain cancer?!? WTF?

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Final Destination Formula

A couple of nights ago, I couldn't fall asleep. It was just one of those nights. After almost ripping my own face off from the rhythmic sounds of Jim snoring and me not being able to wake him up to keep me occupied or even to talk to me...I turned on the tv to see if there was anything to put me to sleep.

Flip, flip flip...

Ah, what's this?

I got to TNT and there it was: Final Destination 3.
Final Destination 3 Pictures, Images and Photos
Not 1, not 2...3.

3 Final Destinations.

Now, I've seen the first one. That airplane scene was pretty neat, if I do say so myself.

I saw the beginning scene to part 2...also very well done. Scary even. Those Final Destination people really know how to play off of our own fears of death, don't they?

Now 3. 3 was...well, exactly the same.

The beginning involves a roller coaster (I'm spoiling, in case you can't tell-so don't be "a hater"-I watch too much Jersey Shore...more on that later)

The roller coaster scene is also cool. I mean, not as cool as the other two...but still, very cool. And scary. Because it makes me think of all of those times that I sat on a roller coaster, waiting and thinking of us flying off the tracks. So yes, you got me again, FD3.

And then the rest of the movie? Aside from that awesome tanning bed scene:

it all fits the same pattern of Final Destination films.

I mean, the characters are sorta different...

FD3 Stars that girl from that dance movie:
Wendy Pictures, Images and Photos

and the guy that played Deckard the creepy computer geek in Halloween: Resurrection:
Final Destination 3 Pictures, Images and Photos
(the guy on the left)

other than that...same.

Here's the FD formula:
1. Crazy death scene after starring character experiences premonition of said death scene.
2. A certain amount of people who would have been involved in the above crazy death scene are spared due to main character's premonition and/or freak-out about the aforementioned premonition.
3. The survivors feel guilt...some don't feel guilt though. Main character feels insane amounts of guilt and is treated like a freak by society.
4. Survivors begin dying one by one in cleverly done death the order that they would have died in the original crazy death scene.
5. Main character and sidekick discover "death's pattern" and try to save the survivors.
6. Main character and sidekick (sometimes love-interest) manage to defy death and "survive".
7. Time passes and then death comes back for them in crazy death scene ending.
8. Sequel.

Final Destination 3 Pictures, Images and Photos

Did anyone see the 3D one yet? Is it any good?
It looks 3D licious: