SpOoOOoOoky Snowmen!

The snowman.

Quite possibly the least offensive character in the entire Christmas cast of characters. I mean honestly, how can you not love that guy? Look at his cute little scarf and his wimpy stick arms...aww...carrot nose. I just want to give him a non-melting hug. What's so scary about him? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Well, unless you make him 8 feet tall...and give him vampire fangs...and put fake blood on him....still though, he'd still be pretty darn cute.




The Yeti.

Also known as the "Abominable Snowman". I feel that we're good enough friends that I can be honest with you, I thought up until writing this blog that it was "Abomidable" not "Abominable". Actually, I would have bet a significant amount of money on it. Not that I use the word enough in my everyday language, but I've said it. Let me just clarify for those of you who also though it was a "d" and not an "n": Merriam Webster dictionary claims that Abomidable is not a real world, and there is a definition for Abominable. So, now that's all cleared up for me.


If you don't like saying A.S. or Yeti, there's always "Bumble" if you're a Rudolph movie enthusiast. Did you know that Rudolph is from 1964? News to me, as well. This blog sure taught me a thing or two about our wintry friends and foes!

Well, Bumble isn't really scary...he's still kinda cute...but for the sake of the movie, he's spOooOoOoOoky with his chompy-metallic-esque teeth.

The Yeti is like an ape/monster that lives in the Himalayan region, hence why he's a "snowman"...I think.

And then, there are Wampas.

**Author's Side Note** Can I just say that I spent the good part of 2 days searching for this friggin' thing?! Clearly I'm not a Luke Skywalker / Star Wars enthusiast, but Jim is, and so I saw this thing in one of the movies one time and was in awe of how awesomely scary he is. I was shocked at how scary this snowguy is, and his arm gets cut off (spoiler! sorry!), and that was all I could remember. I searched Wikipedia's extensive list of Star Wars creatures...and I had no idea what I was looking for. P.S-have you ever seen those definitions? It's like a whole 'nother language. I felt like I didn't know how to read.

Finally, I caved and called Jim, knowing I'd have to tell him the gist of my blog. And within 2.5 seconds of me saying "Star Wars" and "arm gets cut off" Jim didn't even flinch when saying something about the planet Hoth and which movie he was in. I would have sworn he was reading from a book, but he just knows his Star Wars cold. So, thanks Jim for being an insane Star Wars fanatic and assisting Monster Bash Blog! **End Note**

Also, the Yeti can still be found today in popular culture, thanks Wiki! In movies, books, video games, theme park rides...

Which is my next and probably final point.

There's a ride in Animal Kingdom in Disney World that I went on in March, called Expedition Everest, where there's a runaway Yeti coming to get you while you're exploring Mt. Everest! The line to get into the ride is probably the coolest part because they put out all of these spOoOOooOoOky artifacts of Yeti remains and stuff from the missing campers that went ahead of you...in other words: you won't make it back!! muahahahah!! (Just kidding, it's Disney after all). The ride itself wasn't scary, it was the build-up and the possibility of having to go on a huge drop backwards that had me screaming for mercy atop Disney Mt. Everest. But still, the Yeti was the star!

So in conclusion, while the snowman may not appear to be scary....it definitely can be...when it's Abomidnable!

Ho Ho Ho Horror!

Can you believe December is here already? I feel like it was only yesterday that I was camping out at Party City, trying to buy that bag of bones that Jim wouldn't let me get.

And here we are, in a winter wonderland (graveyard), replacing apple cider with hot cocoa and songs about ghosts and goblins with songs about Santa's elves and reindeer.

Even Monster Bash Blog can't help but feel a little good cheer towards the holidays...

Don't think for a second though that I haven't forgotten about all of the great things that February 13, 2009 will bring (Friday the 13th remake!!)


So, bring on those holidays!

Get out your Christmas Tree Costumes...

Decorate your house (p.s. this house is awesome I got it from Google Images...I appreciate it)

And get ready for the most magically spoOoOoOoOoky holiday season ever!

My Horrifying Love of Twilight

My obsession with Twilight is my newest fear. I know, this isn't really about Halloween or pumpkins, but I have to talk about it before I explode.

First of all, being obsessed with any one thing is spOoOOOOoOOoOky because it's all you think about, and sometimes it gets expensive ($75 on the books...), and sometimes...it goes out of control....

which is where i'm teetering now.

It all started last Saturday when Renee asked me to go see it with her and Cos, so I figured what the heck. I hadn't even heard of Twilight until I started seeing the signs for it everywhere plastered all over the place "When you can live forever what do you live for" blah blah blah. whatever, I'll go see it, how bad can it be? I mean, there are Vampires in it!

We saw it at 11 am, and by 1:30 (the movie is 2 hours long), I was at the register at Border's Books buying the book.

I walked immediately from the theater to the book store, I needed no more proof.

Now I'm becoming horrified at myself because it's completely taken over my brain and thought process.

First of all, let's talk about the movie. Have you seen it yet? Ladies? This movie is based on the book of the same name by Stephenie Meyer, and is seeping with perfect romance that us sappy saps love to hate...and hate to love. I hate mushy gushy lovey dovey garbage...but for some reason...this movie....I can't get enough. I want to BE in the movie and book.

And then, there's this guy:

That's Edward Cullen, who is played by Robert Pattinson:

Who I also had never heard of until this movie because I am not an avid Harry Potter fan. But seriously, where has this dude been all my life?

Anyways, he plays the most romantic vampire in the world, and the chemistry between him and Bella Swan (Kristen Stewart) almost made me break a sweat because they seriously should consider dating in real life.

Don't they make a good couple?

I literally watched the entire film with one hand on my cheek and making loud sighs with a huge grin on my face that would say "awwwwwwwwwwwwwww that's niiiiiice" the entire time.

After watching the movie and hating that my life isn't as magical as theirs, we had a reading party where I proceeded to go into a coma of literature. I never read anything more "literary" (*for lack of a better word) than People magazine, and here I am, tearing through a Young Adult section book that is aimed at 12 year old girls and I can't get enough of.

Then Renee and I went again, dragging poor defenseless Jim who rolled his eyes and made gagging noises...while I pointed out all of the things that Edward did and said that I thought Jim might like to take note of...he didn't enjoy that very much.

Then I finished the entire first book, which I think has over 500 pages if memory serves, in about 2 1/2 days.

I decided to speed up the inevitable and so I purchased the other 3 books at 10:00 PM on a Tuesday night at Barnes & Noble. I couldn't imagine not having the rest of the books handy when I finished New Moon, I'd be destroyed.

Then I read the entire unfinished book, kind of out of order, I know, but not really, in one sitting because I couldn't look away. It was leaked online and Stephenie Meyer put it on her website for her readers.

and then Renee I went to see it AGAIN...with Jim once again kicking and screaming the whole way in.

Anyway, I don't want to spoil it for you if you haven't seen it...I mean, I'd love to spoil it for you and blab away about it....

Here's more pictures of him that I like to drool over:

Edward Cullen in a suit is perfection, in my book. SpoOoOooOoky hot vampire perfection, I mean.

Black Friday

Ok, I found something else scary about Thanksgiving season:

Black Friday.

I worked at a mall customer service center for 7 years before moving on to bigger and better things, you'd think I would have already known about this, but fortunately for me, I've blocked such horrid events almost out of memory.

Ah yes, Black Friday. Those two words used to make me absolutely cringe and almost projectile vomit. Waking up early, watching people massacre one another to get a parking spot, people fighting over unnecessary electronics that are not really discounted enough for me to foam at the mouth over them...I mean, $790 for an HDTV is okay...but I would make a complete jackass of myself only for $300 and below.

Some of my worst memories are crazed mothers, toting around their gross, annoying children, who were 8 feet tall and still they wanted to put them strollers that were meant for toddlers, and then behaving worse than their awful kids because there was a height limit.

I really questioned my reasons for living on Black Fridays.

But then, I was free! I ran, screaming from the mall entrance, practically on fire, never to return.

And Black Friday seemed like a distant nightmare, never to be dreamt of again.

(p.s. forgive the way I'm writing, I'm not usually this poetic-y, but I'm currently obsessed with the Twilight saga as is most of the rest of the female population, so bear with me until I find something new to obsess over)

Anyway, my feelings of hatred toward Black Friday have resulted in my only doing my holiday shopping online. I refuse...REFUSE to walk into a mall on Black Friday, because frankly, people become animals. It has made me very cynical. It terrifies me, the thought of fist-fighting with someone over a parking spot, getting flipped off by elderly ladies if I grab the last GPS, the bloodshed, the tears, I can't take it. So I stick with my bffls: Amazon.com, Bestbuy.com, and eBay.com

But then, this year, I had a reawakening of my sheer disgust with Black Friday:

this article.

Don't want to click the link? here's the headline:

Cops hunt Wal-Mart shoppers after worker dies

Now, let me get this straight....Wal-Mart shoppers (plural)...are on the lamb....from...cops....because....a WORKER DIED. Someone DIED on Black Friday because of SHOPPERS.

Basically, a contractor that was hired by Wal-Mart to do some maintenance work was TRAMPLED when he tried to open the doors for the 2,000 shoppers and KILLED.

This happened in New York.

I feel like this is going to turn into like, Planet of the Apes where men evolve into uncivilized mutants and the apes eventually take over (you're welcome, Jim).

I'm going to give you some excerpts that made me especially horrified:

Other workers were trampled as they tried to rescue the man, and customers stepped over him and became irate when officials said the store was closing because of the death, police and witnesses said.

ok, so, people were PISSED that the store was closed because THEY killed someone.

Kimberly Cribbs, who witnessed the stampede, said shoppers were acting like "savages."

When they were saying they had to leave, that an employee got killed, people were yelling `I've been on line since yesterday morning,'" she said. "They kept shopping."

I just threw up.

A woman reported being trampled by overeager customers at a Wal-Mart opening Friday in Farmingdale, about 15 miles east of Valley Stream, Suffolk County police said. She suffered minor injuries, but finished shopping before filling the report, police said.

Are people like this taken seriously?

Items on sale at the Valley Stream Wal-Mart included a Samsung 50-inch Plasma HDTV for $798, a Bissel Compact Upright Vacuum for $28, a Samsung 10.2 megapixel digital camera for $69 and DVDs such as "The Incredible Hulk" for $9

A HA! I totally get it now...he didn't die in vain...I mean, "The Incredible Hulk" for $9?! No wonder!

I've decided that shoppers on Black Friday are among the scariest creatures on Earth.

(Images courtesy of google images.)

Early Darkness = Horror

So, there's really not much that's spoOoOoOoOoky about this holiday season. It's hard for me, Monster Bash blog, to try and dig to find scary things about the holidays. I mean, it's all twinkling and sparkles and choirs and happiness and gifts.


But there is one thing that's frightening about winter...



well, there's a few things, but one that stuck out most to me:


Darkness.


Now that we've "fallen back" and turned the clocks an hour back, it's getting darker earlier.





And if I only know one thing, it's that darkness = scariness.



The Descent really got me into this whole dark thing, because the entire movie is based around being in complete darkness.



But now I find myself leaving work and the sun is setting, and it's not even 5 pm yet.

And it scares me!

What if someone's in the backseat of my car...waiting for me? I can't see them right away...

BECAUSE IT'S DARK!

What if someone is creeping up behind me...will I see them?

NOPE...too dark!

But maybe there's nothing to be afraid of in the dark...


or....


is there?

Birthday Fright!

You know what's really scary?

COOKIE PUSS,


TURNING 26,

....and not remembering any of this:

And being like this by 12:00 Midnight on your bday:

The Descent...into Horror!

So, my dad kept pressuring me to watch the movie "The Descent", and for awhile, I ignored his pleas. I mean, this is the same man who advocated for the movies "White Chicks", "Scary Movie", and "Stealth". All stinkers, in my opinion. So needless for me to say, I didn't want to see the Descent because I figured it'd be pure garbage.

The movie is about this group of women friends who live for adrenaline pumping fun:


The beginning scene engulfs you because there is a tragedy and one of the friends, Sarah, is affected. I'm not going to spill the beans, you have to watch...

Skip ahead and you find out that the one friend, Juno, who's kind of a bitch, decides to plan this awesome caving expedition to this unknown cave deep below the Earth as a way to bring the group of friends back together.

Well, of course everything goes wrong, rocks cover the entrance and block it, the girls are trying to find a 2nd entrance....Sarah has this sneaking suspicion that they're not alone in this cave. Suddenly they hear and see something...

The girls frantically search around for what's going on and you see this through the infrared nightvision:


I jumped 4 feet out of my chair, I was terrified. What the hell was that?!?!

Well, they're called crawlers, and they are mutated human-like creatures that have adapted to living deep beneath the Earth's surface.

The pro? They're completely blind and they hunt based on sound.

A huge gore-fest ensues, and the ending? Well, very ambiguous.

I guess that's why there's a sequel set for February 27, 2009.

How good is this movie?

There are scenes that make you feel claustrophobic:


Grossed out:


Happy to be alive:


and most of all, scared for your life:


This movie rules...for once, dad and I agree on a movie! Check it out!