Saturday, November 29, 2008

Black Friday

Ok, I found something else scary about Thanksgiving season:

I worked at a mall customer service center for 7 years before moving on to bigger and better things, you'd think I would have already known about this, but fortunately for me, I've blocked such horrid events almost out of memory.

Ah yes, Black Friday. Those two words used to make me absolutely cringe and almost projectile vomit. Waking up early, watching people massacre one another to get a parking spot, people fighting over unnecessary electronics that are not really discounted enough for me to foam at the mouth over them...I mean, $790 for an HDTV is okay...but I would make a complete jackass of myself only for $300 and below.
Some of my worst memories are crazed mothers, toting around their gross, annoying children, who were 8 feet tall and still they wanted to put them strollers that were meant for toddlers, and then behaving worse than their awful kids because there was a height limit.

I really questioned my reasons for living on Black Fridays.

But then, I was free! I ran, screaming from the mall entrance, practically on fire, never to return.

And Black Friday seemed like a distant nightmare, never to be dreamt of again.
(p.s. forgive the way I'm writing, I'm not usually this poetic-y, but I'm currently obsessed with the Twilight saga as is most of the rest of the female population, so bear with me until I find something new to obsess over)
Anyway, my feelings of hatred toward Black Friday have resulted in my only doing my holiday shopping online. I refuse...REFUSE to walk into a mall on Black Friday, because frankly, people become animals. It has made me very cynical. It terrifies me, the thought of fist-fighting with someone over a parking spot, getting flipped off by elderly ladies if I grab the last GPS, the bloodshed, the tears, I can't take it. So I stick with my bffls:,, and
But then, this year, I had a reawakening of my sheer disgust with Black Friday:
this article.
Don't want to click the link? here's the headline:
Cops hunt Wal-Mart shoppers after worker dies
Now, let me get this straight....Wal-Mart shoppers (plural)...are on the lamb....from...cops....because....a WORKER DIED. Someone DIED on Black Friday because of SHOPPERS.

Basically, a contractor that was hired by Wal-Mart to do some maintenance work was TRAMPLED when he tried to open the doors for the 2,000 shoppers and KILLED.
This happened in New York.

I feel like this is going to turn into like, Planet of the Apes where men evolve into uncivilized mutants and the apes eventually take over (you're welcome, Jim).
I'm going to give you some excerpts that made me especially horrified:
Other workers were trampled as they tried to rescue the man, and customers stepped over him and became irate when officials said the store was closing because of the death, police and witnesses said.

ok, so, people were PISSED that the store was closed because THEY killed someone.
Kimberly Cribbs, who witnessed the stampede, said shoppers were acting like "savages."
When they were saying they had to leave, that an employee got killed, people were yelling `I've been on line since yesterday morning,'" she said. "They kept shopping."
I just threw up.
A woman reported being trampled by overeager customers at a Wal-Mart opening Friday in Farmingdale, about 15 miles east of Valley Stream, Suffolk County police said. She suffered minor injuries, but finished shopping before filling the report, police said.
Are people like this taken seriously?
Items on sale at the Valley Stream Wal-Mart included a Samsung 50-inch Plasma HDTV for $798, a Bissel Compact Upright Vacuum for $28, a Samsung 10.2 megapixel digital camera for $69 and DVDs such as "The Incredible Hulk" for $9
A HA! I totally get it now...he didn't die in vain...I mean, "The Incredible Hulk" for $9?! No wonder!

I've decided that shoppers on Black Friday are among the scariest creatures on Earth.

(Images courtesy of google images.)